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the grass out side my window
by Eileen Fix
the grass out side my window
brown
dry
rustling with the sound of feet
not those of man but of those borne to fly
I look over my shoulder reminded of the life outside my window
where I sit
immobilized by my disease
the fear
of dis-ablity presenting itself to me
to those passersby interested enough to watch
separating these two companions
my one goal
so certain of its inexorable link
one to the other. fear
to dis-ease
the Dahn say to watch it
where am I uncomfortable?
discover where the dis-comfort is coming from
acknowledge it
name it as pain
where am I uncomfortable?
tell yourself it hurts
so good
abide
bless the pain
where am I uncomfortable?
to answer truthfully
where am I uncomfortable?
I don't know, yet
where am I uncomfortable?
but I shall ... someday soon
later today, maybe
where am I uncomfortable?
M. E. Fix was born in 1968. She started her formal education in Germany and ended at Denison University in Granville, Ohio, where she degreed in theatre and music. Eileen started writing poetry during her divorce and diagnosis of multiple sclerosis. She performs around Seattle, regularly.
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